


Lost

by AndiMackmeetsHeathers



Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, I'm Sorry, Light Angst, M/M, Sad, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:14:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24144214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AndiMackmeetsHeathers/pseuds/AndiMackmeetsHeathers
Summary: TJ has betrayed Cyrus. Is it too late so save their broken relationship?"Hey. What do you want?""Oh, me? I'm just here to put you in your place and remind you of something. He'll never love you, just so you know. It's best that you do know, really. In fact, if there's anyone he's in love with, it's me.""Wait, Cyrus!""TJ, I trusted you. Why are you lying to me?""I'm not!""I want to know the truth.""Cyrus, don't go-" He was gone. "And break my heart."Classic TJ, anything good, he had to ruin it.Nothing would bring Cyrus back now. That was possibly the worst thing of all.
Relationships: Cyrus Goodman/T. J. Kippen
Comments: 4
Kudos: 29





	Lost

**Author's Note:**

> It's quite short but very emotional! I'm so sorry for all the feels, but I randomly had this idea in my head and thought I'd go through with it. It's impulsively written, so I'm sorry if it's not the best. 
> 
> Trigger warning for blasphemy. 
> 
> Don't forget to drop a comment below if you got your angst fix and enjoyed this! Have a great day! (:

"Cyrus!" 

Cyrus continued walking and ignoring the voice behind him. He has a right to be upset, regardless of whether the high and mighty TJ Kippen believed that or not. In the past, the swings had been their place. Where they'd bonded. Where they'd met. Where everything had changed. At least, for Cyrus it had. TJ seemed to be back at square one, and when it came to feelings-well, they weren't exactly reciprocated, were they? 

He'd just been deluding himself, anyway. As per usual. In addition to this, his frustration was overwhelming him, threatening to drown him with sheer anger and self hatred. How could he have done this to himself? Gotten his hopes up so high and then come crashing down? He decided that his heartbreak was only going to be inevitable, in the end. 

"Cyrus!" 

Maybe he was being a bit dramatic about it all, or tough on TJ for not giving him a chance. But he'd had enough of being screwed over by his friend already. That's not what friends did. Even if it was for the sake of their girlfriends, because there was no way that he wasn't being lied to earlier about Kira and TJ not being a couple. Great. Just another confirmation that he couldn't trust the guy. Who could you trust in this world? Not your family, not your friends, not even yourself and your own goddamn instincts, apparently.

Where had those landed him? Walking away from the guy he cared about so much because he felt hurt by something he should have protected himself from feeling. Love wasn't easy, he knew as much, but this wasn't love. Not really. Just some unrepicrocated adolescent crush destined to go nowhere and break his heart. He did seem to have a tendency for falling for straight guys. Nobody ever told you exactly how painful that was, even though it was nothing perosnal, of course. Perhaps that's what made it worse. He wasn't sure. He wasn't certain of a lot of things, at the moment. Other than how the world was spinning a bit too fast for his liking at the moment and the way his tears obscured his vision completely. 

"Cyrus!" 

That's when he noticed a tap on his shoulder. But it wasn't TJ. It was Kira. It looked like she'd caught up with him faster than TJ had, somehow. 

"Hey." 

"Hey. What do you want?" 

"Oh, me? I'm just here to put you in your place and remind you of something. He'll never love you, just so you know. It's best that you do know, really. In fact, if there's anyone he's in love with, it's me." 

The words were like a punch to the stomach. Cyrus couldn't quite breathe properly for a few seconds, almost as though he'd forgotten how to, and he felt sick. Yes, he was already aware of this, but hearing those words escape from Kira's mouth was incredibly painful and crushing any sort of self esteem he had left. 

He'd bet good money on that bejng the reason why they were known as crushes-because when everything inevitably went wrong, they crushed into a million tiny little pieces. 

He tried not to show his feelings on his fave as he spoke tentatively, almost as if he was terrified of the words that would come out of his mouth.

"I know that. Believe me. That was why I was leaving. And in happy for you guys, seriously. You deserve each other. I'm sorry for ever getting in the way." 

With that being said, Cyrus stormed off for the second time that day. It was all he was good at, now. Running away from his problems the second they became too much. Smart idea, Cyrus. Smart freaking idea. 

"Wait, Cyrus!" 

This time, it truly was TJ. He didn't know whether to be relieved or annoyed. 

"What is it?" He didn't mean for his words to be so sharp, and he winced the second he heard himself speak. 

"Please look at me. I'm sorry, okay?" Cyrus made eye contact with the guy again, despite how painful it was for him to do so. "I messed up. Big time. It was our spot, our place. You have every right to be mad at me, or betrayed, or upset." 

"Yes, yes I do." 

"Cyrus. You're trembling. You need to sit d-" 

"I'll be fine! Don't worry about me. You weren't earlier when you were having so much fun with your girlfriend. You know what? It's fine. You guys are happy together." 

TJ scooped, his eyebrows knitting together. "But we're not together." 

Cyrus laughed, but it sounded harsh and fake. "Yeah right. I had fun being your third wheel earlier, really I did, but I've gotta go. Next time, maybe tell me she's here before letting me come round here like an idiot!" 

TJ attempted to reach out for Cyrus, but Cyrus moved away. "You're not an idiot. I promise. If anything, I'm the idiot for hurting such a good person like this. You were never the third wheel. I didn't even want her there. We're not together and we never will be." 

"TJ, I trusted you. Why are you lying to me?" 

"I'm not!" 

A pregnant pause settled over them as they both tried to get their heads wrapped around the fact that TJ ha just yelled. He never yelled. Not at Cyrus, at least.

"I want to know the truth." 

TJ bit his nails, a nervous habit of his. Cyrus had no idea what TJ was even so nervous about, other than the possibility of losing this friendship, the one that clearly meant very little to him.

"Fine. She pressured me into it, alright? Kira challenged me and I stupidly couldn't resist. That's all there is to it, I swear." 

"Really?" 

"Yes, really! Why don't you trust me?" 

"Why do you think?" 

"Look, Cyrus. It's nothing. She forced me into it on Costume Day and did the same with the swings." 

"Did she? Or did you just make the wrong decisions?" 

"Nice to know you trust me." 

"Nice to know you value me." 

TJ teared up a little at that. "Cyrus, of course I value you. You mean so much to me." 

"Prove it." 

TJ suddenly looked scared. "I-you mean so much to me. You changed me for the better." 

"If that's true, then why do you keep letting me down time after time?" 

"I don't!" 

"Yes, you do! The Gun Incident. Costume Day. And now this." Cyrus pointed out , striking each event down on his fingers. 

TJ tried to reach out for Cyrus again, but Cyrus moved away. "Cyrus, I'm sorry." 

"Sorry isn't good enough. Sorry means that you won't do it again. Then you did. Twice." 

"Come on, be fair." 

"I'm trying, but it's so hard right now. You mean a lot to me, don't get me wrong. But you mean too much. Which means everything hurts too much. I'm sorry. I'm staying away from you. I don't know how long for yet. A while." 

"Cyrus, no. Please don't do this to me."

"I'm really sorry, TJ." 

"Cyrus-" 

"It's self care. I hope you understand."

"We can figure something out, please don't leave." 

"I'm sorry. Goodbye. I really care about you, more the you think. Even when I can't be around you. I hope you're happy with her."

This was for the best, Cyrus thought to himself. Without turning back, he left so he couldn't take back his decision. It was imperative that he did this for himself.

"Cyrus, don't go-" He was gone. "And break my heart." 

TJ felt himself swaying as he fell to the floor, his legs crumpling beneath him. He'd tried to be strong. It hasn't worked. He'd tried to make himself vulnerable to Cyrus. That also hadn't worked.

Classic TJ, anything good, he had to ruin it. 

"TJ, get up. Come on!" Kira demanded. Reluctantly, TJ obliged. Kira smiled. 

"Kira, he's gone. He meant the world to me and jess gone. Because of you." Kira shook her head, never willing to take the blame or own up to what she'd done.

"No, TJ. This is all on you. You're the one who keeps messing up, time after time. Not me." 

"Yeah, but you said something to him, didn't you? It probably pushed him over the edge. I hate seeing him so upset." 

"Then maybe you shouldn't make him feel that way so often. Tell you what, let's go back there and hang out, maybe kiss a little-" 

How dare she? "I'm gay! You know I'm gay, Kira! How could you say that?" 

"Maybe I could make you straight." 

"That's ridiculous! You literally can't make anyone into something they're not." Kira smirked and TJ felt uneasy, all of a sudden.

"Okay. Have fun with that." 

"I don't care what you do at this point. Things are bad enough as it is." 

It was true. Everything was so awful, so what if he was outed to the school? He'd just report her to Principal Metcalfe. Still, he was aware that his basketball friends could potentially not be so open minded about him being gay. A lot of people wouldn't be. 

Still, he'd be the one suffering the consequences and not Cyrus. That was something. Or to him it was, anyway. 

"Fine. Have it your way. Bye, TJ." 

Then she was gone too, leaving TJ drowning in his thoughts. He was lost without Cyrus, but there was nothing that he could do about it now. It was all his fault. Nothing would bring Cyrus back now. 

That was possibly the worst thing of all.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this, let me know your thoughts below and remember to look after yourself and have a wonderful day! (:


End file.
